Posts tagged family
Farewell to Tara Druyor 11-19-88 to 12-13-09
Dec 26th
This is written with a very heavy heart. I have been silent in my grief. I do not have enough words to describe how it feels when you lose someone who is so much like your own child.
Our family met Tara when our youngest was in 2nd grade. One day she asked if she could go over to her house, the next time it was if she could come to our’s. Tara delighted me from day one. She was smart, and sassy and very much like a little pixie. She became a fixture around our house. Often spending most of the weekend with us and time after school a couple times of week. She made me laugh at a time in my life when laughing was sometimes very hard.
Tara was tragically killed in a car/train accident. She wasn’t driving. I don’t think that she would’ve wanted to go out that way – it wasn’t exactly her style. Even now, it is hard to write about her let alone talk about her or think about her.
The other day I was cleaning and organizing some boxes when I came across some pictures of my mother’s 70th birthday party. Tara was there that day, sitting between my two daughters (I want to say my two other daughters because she was so much like a daughter to me) and you could see her laughing. I remember that day as if it were yesterday and not almost 11 yrs ago. My hubby (who was only engaged to me then) had helped me plan a surprise party for my mother at a rather nice restaurant and had even helped to pay for my older sister, who lives out of state, to fly in for the party. On the day of the party Tara’s mom called and asked if we could take her for the day as they had to attend their son’s swim meet out of town andTara didn’t really want to go. I asked her to put Tara in something other than jeans and bring her over. When she found out why she couldn’t believe that I would willingly take Tara; see Tara was a bit of headstrong child and often butted heads with her mom. But take her, we did and she didn’t embarrass me or even step out of line; she was a good girl the whole day. Behaved just like she was my own. Yup, I couldn’t stop crying when I saw those pictures; just like now when I think of her.
And every time I sit in my living room and see the white paint on my wood trim – I will think of Tara – you see it was her that painted my living room when I needed it done. I couldn’t do it because of injuries to my back and Tara stepped right in and volunteered to do it. She was just that way to me.
I was there for her when she needed me and she would be there for me when I needed her. Did she have some issues? Yes she did, but who among us doesn’t? I will choose to remember the good times with her, I will choose to remember the little pixie who often showed up unannounced needing to talk, to cry, to be listened to or just be hugged and I will remember her warm hugs in return.
I miss you baby.
An Open Letter to My Sister-in-Law
Nov 28th
Dear ……..
This in response to the email you sent about birthdays and Christmas presents and all subsequent emails that have been sent back and forth between your brother and you. Since I was included in them I am answering them, even though your brother will not let me actually send this to you.
As far as you being out on disability for 2 or 3 months and you are now behind on your bills – or so you stated – try being in our shoes and being on it for more than 4 years – do you remember that we have kids at home?
How about why should I buy you a birthday present when I have done so for the last 12 years and have yet to receive one from you? After all we have been sister-in-laws for the last 9 of those years. Your brother still wants to send one from both of us, even though you continually ignore my birthday and are less than pleasant to him when you do decide to give us a call. Your rendition of “Happy Birthday” that included the line about looking and smelling like a monkey that you left on our voice mail for your brother’s birthday was totally juvenile. We try to overlook that part of you, but honey since you constantly do stuff like that, it makes it rather difficult.
Oh, and your indignation about mentioning the girls? First, let me remind you that you asked about them and exchanging presents in your first email. Second, as of last Christmas you said, “If they decide to exchange presents with me on birthdays we will see what happens.” So it should come to no surprise to you that they aren’t exchanging birthday presents with you since both of their’s were first and you didn’t call much less send a card or present. But there you are worrying about who will be getting you something.
As to exchanging lists for Christmas being “told what to get someone”; honey, I don’t know anyone who is rich enough in this family to get everything that someone has listed on a Christmas list unless they have listed only one item that retails for under $10. Usually there is a minimum of 10 items on a typical list of varying prices so you get one or two things, maybe three if they are inexpensive or just one big one. I have no idea what planet you live on or what corner of the world you come from that is so markedly different from the one that the rest of us inhabit.
From what I have known about you and witnessed you are a very immature, spoiled little beyotch who whines worse than any 3 yr old that I have ever had the chance to encounter. You run to your “mommy” about every little thing that you perceive as a ’slight’ from another family member and expect her to fight your battles for you. Honey, even the fact that you call your mom “mommy” at your age is so strange I don’t even want to go there. Your behavior has done so much to ruin relationships within the family that I, for one, am done with you. I can only hope and pray that one day your brother will come to see what you continue to do to hurt those of us that he loves.
Sincerely,
Quiet Sunday
Nov 15th
This is a quiet Sunday afternoon. The girls are out with Papa and the rest of that side of their family to go eat at Mongolian Bar-b-q. I don’t expect them home for dinner so sweet hubby and I will probably either eat leftovers or make sandwiches. I don’t feel much like rustling up a big meal.
Today was what they call Eat-n-Greet at church – personally I call it potluck, though I am not allowed to use that terminology when writing anything to advertise it. They designed it as a way for families to stay after, enjoy a meal and each other’s company. Since I have counting duties on the same week as the meal, I have to make sure to grab food beforehand or else I won’t eat. Today the main dish was stuffed cabbage or Golumpki which I absolutely love and rarely get – especially home made ones. My friend Kathy made them and they were to die for – about 4 inches long and at least 2 1/2 inches around – totally delicious. Even though Kathy had made a full size roaster of the stuffed cabbage there was only one left when the meal was done. There were also home made mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, fresh bread, corn and a few desserts to choose from. We brought a simple yellow cake with chocolate icing that I made last night before going up to bed. After a lunch like that I really don’t want to make much of a dinner.
As soon as I sign off of here, sweet hubby and I are going to tackle the “dining room/family room/office” and get the rest of the boxes out of there. We would love to be able to use that room over the holidays – just can’t seem to get the gumption up to hoe it out. My friend, Lisa, volunteered to come help me hoe it out and organize it as she used to do that for a living – hmmmm maybe once we get the majority of the boxes out of there that might be an option.
Well, if I sit here and procrastinate much longer it will be bedtime before I know it……………. that won’t get anything done at all.
Later…………..
Life today
Nov 9th
Well, it is a little cooler today than it has been the last 2 days but still warm enough to be outside without a coat. As far as I am concerned this could go on till December or January – I really have no use for cold temperatures and that wet white stuff that just causes more work and back strain.
Right now I am sitting in my kitchen listening to sweet hubby tutor the little one in accounting. (I probably should think up some other way to identify her as she is now 20. Just like all moms though, that one is still my baby – as is her older sister.) I am also smelling the roast in the oven that is covered with onions and carrots. Dinner time can’t come too soon for me – I am already hungry and still have an hour to go.
Today we went up to the chiropractor and he helped me to feel better. We also found out that the annual Thanksgiving dinner delivery that we help out with that doc’s office does will be on Sunday, Nov. 22nd which just happens to be sweet hubby’s birthday. He doesn’t mind doing that on his birthday, though doc said we didn’t have to drive if he did. We will also be there the day before with our youth kids from church helping to pack up the food.
Tonight we have a board meeting and I probably should call the other member to see if she will be attending because it would be dumb to drive that far if she isn’t going to show up. Been there done that and the wallet can’t handle any more unneccessary expenses.
Perhaps I will have some more to add to this later – like if the roast was good and how the meeting went if we had it.
Till then………
Lazy Sunday
Nov 1st
Today we left home and took a bit of a drive up north. Right now finds us sitting at Momma & Jay’s house, our bellies full of a delicious chicken dinner and our taste buds still thinking about the awesome dessert. Soon though it will be time to head up the stairs to bed. (There is a rumor that there is that incredible omelet that Jay makes so well for breakfast)
So other than waking up at the crack of dawn to get to church, then the almost 2 hr drive to get up here – it has been a pretty lazy Sunday. Nothing like good food and being with family to make it end well.
Hopefully you were able to enjoy sun and had the nice weather that we had today. It made everything very enjoyable today.
Musings….
Oct 21st
Today was the second day of some beautiful Indian Summer days. Temp was good for shirt sleeves and the sun felt good. Of course, not having any manpower to assist me outside I couldn’t do a quick organization of one side of the garage that I have been waiting for this time of year to do. Hopefully it will be done before we hit cold weather and the start of that nasty white stuff.
I realized just now that I hadn’t written in a couple of days. My idea was to start writing again every day to every other day – some days I am just plain not into it; some days my brain just does not want to come up with an idea to write about. And then are some blogs that I read where they are only being written once a week, or only when that person gets access to a computer which could be weeks or over a month or two at a click. Then I wonder why I beat myself up over it.
Right now, sweet hubby is making his delicious buttered popcorn out in the kitchen and has whipped up a couple of sandwiches so that we can eat our late dinner and watch some of the stuff on the DVR.
Now, I don’t know how many of you have DVRs or somehow record shows to watch later – but we do and then it becomes a battle of computer time vs going upstairs to watch what is taped. Once up there is it watch our shows or watch that movie we have been dying to see. And making decisions about it is very hard too. Ah the dilemma of it all.
Tomorrow is the day for haircuts, a perm and a beard trim and then on Friday there is our family picture being taken. The first one in about 10yrs. Wish us luck on that one!
Happy Birthday to Me……….
Apr 13th
Quite possibly one of the worst birthdays I had in a long time. Don’t ask.
Sweet hubby tried to make it better by surprising me with devil’s food, chocolate frosted, heart shaped cupcakes. (Yes, you can go awwww)
Earlier in the month (if it had only been my birthday that day) I had a much better day. SEB (whom I have ‘adopted’ as my little bro) and his daughter, Courtney (my ‘niece’) came over as we were having problems with our main PC and the girls’ laptops. 10 minutes after hanging up from him telling us he was on his way, the phone rang again. This time it was Momma (who is his real mom and my ‘other’ mother) and Dad Jay saying that they would like to come down with Brandy.
Soon SEB was here and busily working on the youngest’s laptop, while Courtney and I visited. Sweet hubby immersed himself in WoW till SEB was ready to work on that PC.
Of course, being me, I told only sweet hubby and Courtney about all the company.
All too soon the phone rang and it was Momma telling us that they had missed our road and were having a refreshing root beer about a 1/2 mile away and Brandy was woofing down a hot dog. I told them to hurry over as pizza had been ordered.
What a surprise SEB, Momma and Dad Jay got when all were in the house. What a surprise Zo got when she saw Brandy. (Honest, I never knew that cats tails could get that big and bushy!!!)
So then we feasted on salad, pizza and sodas – all good.
Momma brought both sweet hubby and I presents. I received a beautiful, blue shrug which fit as if I had been to her house for a fitting. Sweet hubby received a lovely multicolor afghan which is as big as the top of our king sized bed. All the time Momma was making it she would refer to it as the “ugly” afghan. Neither of us find it ugly at all. It goes in any room with any color. It is warm and big enough to share on our bed on cold nights.
I haven’t wrote Momma & Dad Jay to thank them for those lovely presents, I basically suck at writing Thank You notes.
Thank you Momma & Dad Jay we loved our presents and we loved the fact that you drove all the way down to our house – now, that was real special.
Geez, I feel a bit better all ready.
Just One of Those Days
Jan 27th
Today has just been one of those days………
Had to sit with sweet hubby and figure out the bills, had to clean out the fridge, still have to mop the kitchen floor and then comes a phone call….
from Aunt Karen…..just wanted to let you know that your dad is in the ER right now, he had a car accident with a bus.
The whole sentence made one sit heavily into a chair. Is he ok? I don’t know he just called me on the phone.
Why don’t you call him and talk to him.
So I called him and talked to him, he thought his leg was broken but didn’t want us to come there. Stay home, no need to come, Karen will come.
The ER doctor called me – he has a broken knee but the ortho doesn’t want to do surgery because of his other health problems. They are looking to
see if they can immobilize it till it heals instead. Oh, so much fun we will be having.
So here I sit trying to wrap my head around this latest news and haven’t even thought what to make for dinner. Guess I should go do that……
Meet Our Newest Family Member
Nov 30th
Just wanted to do a quick one and let you see a picture of our newest family member.
Our oldest one just got a kitten. One of our friends had a cat that had kittens and since she has been wanting one, they brought it down when they came to spend Thanksgiving with us. She had picked her out right before Halloween; we had to wait for her to be old enough to leave her momma.
Here is a picture of Zonia (Zoe-nyah) or just Zo for short.
Seems the little furball likes to play with straws and bits of paper. Her favorite place to sleep, so far, is on the top of my boobs with her head tucked under my chin. She likes to ride on my shoulder while I walk around the house. Can’t get too attached though, when the oldest gets her own place the cat goes with her. Oh well……
It Doesn’t Seem Like……………
Jul 28th
That’s right, it doesn’t seem like 8 years!!
8 years ago today found sweet hubby and I becoming husband and wife. Funny how fast these years have flown, with nary a dull moment to be had. We have proved to each other that we can be counted on during sickness and health and richer and poorer, in good times and bad and we do alright with happy, funny and sad.
Ok, enough of the bad poetry. Today I received a real sweet card that sweet hubby made for me on the computer. It contained one of his poems. He also managed to get me a cookbook, two movies and the first season of one of our favorite shows. The girls gave us a nice card with a gift certificate to a favorite restaurant and one for two movie tickets so that we can enjoy a night out. The little one even baked us a batch of brownies while we were at the doctors’ today. We received a few gifts of money from other family members which we are using toward the purchase of a Wii. (We figure a Wii will give us some exercise that won’t outright kill us from the beginning! Ya know being mainly couch potatoes and all)
And now we are working on our 9th year!!
Happy Anniversary Baby!!