If I could

turn back time.  Yes, we all remember those song lyrics – ok, maybe those of you who are musically challenged don’t – at least most of us remember the chorus – If I could turn back time………….

Just read my last entry and thought, I wish I could turn back time.  When I wrote that 18 days ago my father was only in the hospital and no one had told us yet that he was close to dying; in fact we didn’t even hear that until slightly more than 3 and 1/2 hours before he passed away.  There was just no time to prepare; we tried to digest it while we ate lunch; we tried to deal with it while telling his sister-in-law, while discussing with her how to tell my sisters that they had given him 3 to 10 days; and we even were still dealing with it when we came back to his room to find that he had already passed away while we had sat in the family lounge waiting for his dialysis to be done.

Of course I went out to the funeral home’s website to see if anyone had left a comment on the guest book only to find that my ex-husband had left a really snarky one there about how he had wished that he and my girls had gotten to know my father better while he had been married to me.  Really?  Seems like he wasn’t all that concerned about much to do with my family anyway.  Always had reasons why we couldn’t go to reunions or family get-togethers; to the point that we stopped getting invited to attend.   I was looking for comfort or a memory that had been shared and I got snarky.

I remember growing up and my grandmother would always tell us she loved us – every time we walked in or out of her house; whether it was to go to the store or for the drive back to our house 3 hrs away.  Her reasoning was that you just never know if that will be the last time that you get to tell someone that you love them.  And I sit here and I try to remember if I had said I love you when I was leaving after our annual Christmas dinner or did I just say thanks for dinner Dad and good-bye?

For those of you that know me, you know that my relationship with him was not always the best.  As my parents’ marriage deteriorated so did their relationships with their kids.  Some of us just moved away from the pain and bitterness that was constantly spewing and others, it seemed, just didn’t let it faze them.  Only if you really knew each other did you know how the other was affected.   For me it was easier to just listen to my mother complain and say some of the worst things a parent could say to their child about their other parent; it wasn’t till years later that I started trying to seek out the truth – not that I ever found all of it; just found enough to perhaps balance out some of the things that got said.  And enough to realize that totally walking away was probably not the wisest thing I have ever done.

So, I can sit here and be all full of regrets, not that that will change anything; or I can take this as one of those life lessons that smack you in the face and learn from it.   I learned before that one should take time to find out both sides of a conflict before making a decision and that one should never rush into the decision.  I also thought I learned that one should always say I love you before leaving those you love; just in case and so you don’t have regrets.   Maybe I didn’t learn that one as well as I should’ve; if I could turn back time maybe I would find out that I did or maybe if I didn’t; at least I would be able to say it while he still could hear me.

Happy 2013!!

WOW!! It sure seems like time is flying faster and faster as I get older.  Hope you have celebrated all your holidays with your loved ones!

Christmas dinner with my father and his sister-in-law was pretty good, waiting for a table for an hour and a half while the hostess slipped in a few bigger parties in front of us wasn’t though.  I was supposed to write to the corp website and voice the complaint; too much has happened since that evening for it to get done.

My father suffered a fall at his nursing home and is now laying in a hospital – not quite sure that he will pull out of it this time.  It put a sober note to the holidays!

Christmas day brunch – became either “lupper” or “lunner” depending on what you call your evening meal.  It went well considering we haven’t entertained anyone in a couple of years.  My niece said I worried about the whole thing too much.  They gave us a couple of jars of bread n butter pickles that they had put up this past summer following my grandmother’s recipe.  I would swear that my grandma had made them herself; what a wonderful memory brought back to life!

And now it is the New Year and we are up in “Hooterville” as Cin (my official little sister) would call where Momma lives.  I can’t think of a better place to spend the holiday. Good people, good food and good times!!   Hope you spent your New Year’s Eve with people that you love (or at least enjoy) and that this New Year will be so much better than the last for all of us!!

Now, I am going to settle back onto the couch with my cup of coffee and a piece of coffee cake and enjoy the music of Air Supply that Momma has put on for our enjoyment this morning.

The holidays

are fast approaching and I am far from ready.  The tree is up and it’s bare limbs mock me every day. Sweet hubby has done some baking but it too is far from finished.  I have most of the shopping done; have to get up at the crack of dawn tomorrow to go back to Meijers to get the ham, GFS to pick up more eggs and a veggie tray; K-mart to pick up something for Mimi; Ollie’s to pick up something for the fiance of the youngest and then home to clean, decorate, pack cookies to ship to the assorted in-laws, finish doing cards, go to the post office and in between times eat and if I am really, really lucky maybe a quick nap.

The oldest one is arriving early for the holidays and will be showing up sometime tomorrow afternoon.  Hopefully all the presents that I ordered online will start arriving by Friday – that would be a good thing!!  Have already received some of them, just waiting for the rest.

Tomorrow night we will take pizza to Mimi.  It will give her a chance to visit with the oldest one and also the littlest one when she shows up after work.  Then Sunday there are tentative plans to visit with Pops and have dinner with him and his sister-in-law.   Christmas day will find us hosting my niece and her hubby; now this is making me nervous as she has never been here, we have always met at restaurants.

I guess I better call this a night since it just slipped into Thursday already.


Straight No Chaser

that is group that I will be seeing tonight at the Fox Theatre in Detroit.  My nephew had posted about them on Facebook and so being the curious sort that I am, I headed over to YouTube and searched.  I found a video of them performing at YouTube headquarters and watched all 42 minutes of it.  My favorite song was The Christmas Can-Can which can be found at 17:30 mark in this video: Straight No Chaser in concert at YouTube it is really funny.  (fast forward past the interview for more singing)

This was a present from my girls – chauffeured by the youngest one, out for dinner at a restaurant (not sure of the name) that I think is Italian, and then the concert.  Of course, the oldest one won’t be here as she is hard at work in NYC and won’t be home for the holidays till the 21st.

Today started with picking a couple of our friends up at the airport.  They were coming in from Hawaii where they had gone for their 25th anniversary.  Lots of little interesting stories on the ride home and I am sure the next time we get together we will hear some more.

So, my day will be long – I think that I will be taking a nap this afternoon – but it will end with this concert and that will be really fun!!  I can hardly wait!

Two more sleeps and

a wake up then it will be the day to see the surgeon to get cleared to drive and resume living.  So looking forward to that visit, I don’t even care if it involves more bright lights in my eye!!

Not much is going on at the moment.  Seem to be napping and sleeping in more than getting things accomplished. Today sweet hubby made me bacon and eggs for brunch while I took a shower and chatted to Momma on the phone. He also made me pumpernickel toast which I slathered with harlequin pear jam that found it’s way here from Momma and Jay’s!!   Brunch was a hit!

Some people are having difficulties and are in my thoughts.  My sister-in-law who is a quad is hospitalized with pancreatitis and a bad gallbladder.  They nixed gallbladder surgery as it is very difficult to do with the way her colostomy is positioned.  So they are giving her massive doses of antibiotics to try to get it to heal.  One of my other friends had a family at their church who lost everything in a house fire.  They are collecting things to help them out as they got put into a condo for the moment.  They mentioned that the husband had his computer burn up.  I am wondering if we have any that would be alright to donate – or if, like many things around here, the computer would be too out of date/old to be of use to anyone.

Today I haven’t done much.  Went to the mall to pick up the Christmas ornaments that we had put on layaway – best thing ever invented.  Came home, made some phone calls then left to go eat dinner at church to help the youth group raise money for their annual trip, then to church because it is Advent so they have a special service on Wednesday.  They had the first and second graders sing a song during the service, it was cute; don’t ask me what they sang as I was not quite focused on the music.

Now sweet hubby is already up the stairs and I should be heading up that way too.

Hope you had a slightly more productive day in your neck of the woods!!

Trying to get back on track

Well, a lot has happened since the last time I wrote.  Oh, I had plans of getting the Christmas tree put up Thanksgiving weekend, then that got switched to Monday; which was doctor day for hubby so we switched it till Tuesday and added doing laundry to the list as well.  Now, I am not sure what happened to Tuesday; I just know that the tree didn’t get put up and laundry didn’t get done.


Wednesday we had to head into Detroit to get hubby his monthly shot and he wanted to get some Mexican at one of his favorite spots – only it is over in Westland so we called our friends in Garden City to meet us there.  After dinner they invited us back to their house so off we went to there, as we really haven’t visited for quite a few months.  By the time we got home it was going on Thursday and I had a bunch of calling to do to find venue’s for the youngest one’s upcoming wedding.

Thursday night sitting in bed watching the latest Sons of Anarchy episode I began to see black dots and swirls in front of my eye and I was getting a bit of a headache so went to sleep hoping it would pass.  Friday morning the few dots became more like a bunch of pepper had been spilled in my eye so it was off to our eye doctor for an exam.  I was examined first by one of her residents, a very tall, very nice man (she trains a lot of eye doctors) and then she came in for a look – so it was double the real bright lights in an eye already hurting.  She said that she couldn’t really see any sign of retinal tearing only that I had a few “bleeders” that were causing the dots.  I was sent home with instructions to make an appointment with their retinal specialist for the coming week and the direction to call the office immediately if my vision became worse and to follow the instructions on their answering machine for assistance.

Out we went to dinner to celebrate the youngest one getting engaged.  We drove her and met our future son-in-law at the restaurant that they picked out, getting there just ahead of the Friday night dinner crowd.  I was enjoying a wonderful dinner and having laughs with them when suddenly it was like having a brown opaque contact over my eye.

We finished dinner and headed for home.  Called the doctor’s answering machine and followed the instructions for contacting the “resident on call” which put me in touch with a different resident than the one I had met earlier.  She was very pleasant and very concerned.  She had to examine my eye, so more drops and more bright lights.  After the exam she made a few phone calls and made arrangements for me to go to an eye clinic in Royal Oak the next morning.   We went home to wait for the morning.

Shortly after we got home the resident called again to tell me that there had been a change of plans and instead of the clinic I had to go to a retinal specialist at a hospital instead.  Oh boy.

Woke up Saturday early Saturday morning for the journey into see the specialist.  More drops, more bright lights and an ultrasound of my eye and guess what?? It was a “small retinal tear” that would require surgery; oh, by the way have you eaten today??  Ate breakfast so that pushed the surgery till 7pm as I also had a few people ahead of me.

Got through the surgery just fine.  Was in recovery and wanted to go home; so as I was dressing to go home I suddenly became very nauseous.  This was due to the anesthesia that they used on me.  It took 2 hours for the pharmacy to send up a drug to handle that so I could ride home without puking my guts out.  Unfortunately it took so long to get to me that I had a few big urps, which when I told that to the doc during my post-op exam on Sunday he was a bit concerned as that type of movement could hurt the eye.

So here it is Sunday night, hubby has been doing laundry because I can’t lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk and can’t do any chores till my appt on Friday and I get “cleared”.    Nope, the tree isn’t up and it doesn’t look like that is happening any time soon.  The plans for popping over to Momma and Jay’s to help put up the outside lights on Saturday had to be ditched because of having surgery instead – can’t drive up and surprise anyone when you can’t see!!

Hopefully the eye will heal soon and I can get back on track with decorating the house.

I know that Monday I will be driving  riding with the youngest as we look at venues for the wedding.  I had already set up the appointments and as long as I am only riding in the vehicle it is a do-able thing.  When I get home from that, I will probably need a nap before dinner.

So, that’s what is new in this neck of the woods – what’s new in your’s??

Happy Turkey Day to YOU!! Happy Birthday to Sweet Hubby

Good morning!!  Been up for 2 hours now and the turkey is stuffed and in the oven, and jello salad made with one small error – used chunked pineapple instead of crushed; people will just have to deal with it.  Corn pudding, plain green beans (I live with picky eaters), mashed potatoes, gravy (both chicken and beef – refer to previous comment), crescent rolls, sweet potatoes and pumpkin pie round out the menu.   You can, just now, faintly start to smell the turkey roasting in the oven.

Now, we’ve had the heat sensor replaced in the oven so hopefully the turkey won’t cook in it’s usual 2 to 3 hr window and instead be done at 2pm when it is supposed to be done.  I am so tired of turkey being done hours before the meal and being drier than dry.  Of course, according to my friend from South America, we make turkey all wrong.  To make it correctly (according to him) one must brine the turkey in orange juice overnight and it will be the most moist turkey you could ever imagine.  I am wondering if he has a valid point, as last night I watched several people put gallon jugs of orange juice in their carts next to their turkeys.  Though, there is also the part of me that thinks the orange juice was for a tequila sunrise or some other mixed drink to help them cope with a house full of relatives today.  (I didn’t follow them up to the front of the store where the liquor is sold, so don’t know for sure.)

Today is also sweet hubby’s 49th birthday – I can put his age as men don’t seem to mind people knowing how old they are; I think that is more a female thing.  I have had him in my life for 16 and 1/2 years.  He is working hard on improving his health so that he stays around for a long, long while.  So here is to my sweet hubby – Happy Birthday Sweetheart!!!

I am getting hungry smelling this turkey so am thinking maybe I can (sneak) making a cup of coffee; hopefully the smell of roasting turkey will mask the scent of coffee brewing as I don’t want anyone feeling ill today.  Also, especially, since that particular party also has to go into work tonight and work till 6am.  Got to love a job in retail – NOT!!  And then cook up the roast beef hash that was prepped last night and have that with a couple of eggs on top.  Off I go…………

I hope all of you have a HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!


24 + hours

In 24 hours and 15 minutes I won’t be able to eat anything – I am having carpal tunnel surgery on my right hand on Friday – not sure of the time yet as that is TBD.  I should be getting a phone call tomorrow to let me know what time and I already told them that since my blood sugar is unstable that I should be on the list first.  We will see how well they listened.

Last night my father was taken to the hospital. He was constipated to the point it hurt.  Today he is doing much better but is still being held for “observation”.   His sister-in-law visited him tonight and said he was better than she had seen him in days.  He was eating his dinner and chatting; all signs that he is feeling better.

I have been rearranging boxes on the front porch and throwing stuff out.  It is my goal to get that area organized and things gotten rid of, recycled, repurposed, sold or put into use.  I am tired of boxes everywhere!!  I did find somethings that I have been looking for and I am still looking for others.  I also found a few things that I didn’t know that I had; sweet hubby remembered when, where and why they were purchased; me, I had no clue.

So, I won’t be posting for at least 2 weeks – unless I heal fast – so thought that I would post a little something now so you wouldn’t miss me to much! lol

Hope all is well in your neck of the woods!!

Happy Haunting!!  Happy Halloween!!


Indian Summer

Just when I get all set in my mind that fall is here; cool weather and good sleeping are around the corner along comes some Indian Summer days.  I LOVE Indian Summer days, I really do.  Nothing sweeter than a few days of over 70 degree weather and plenty of sunshine to improve my mood.  I am just looking forward to the kinds of meals that the cooler weather brings to our house; beef stew, chili, bean & ham soup, potato soup or a slow cooked pot roast done with onions, carrots and taters.  (If i wasn’t so stuffed from lunch I would positively be drooling on this keyboard!!)

I am glad that today turned out like it has as we had to be up early on which was a grey, wet morning to drive up to take my father to his bi-annual heart check-up.  This is never a pleasant task and a rainy day just makes it that much worse.  We got there and instead of our usual 30 to 45 minute past our appt time wait we were taken back within 15mins of arrival – write that one in the books!!  When we were done with the doctor portion he announced that it had been two years since they had checked the valve replacement and he would see if the gal could take us so that we didn’t have to make the long journey from our home again.  The Gods smiled and the lady had an opening so long as we didn’t mind waiting for another 30 minutes.  Honey if waiting 30 minutes means I don’t have to jump out of bed at the crack of dawn and drive in construction traffic and then sit in that waiting room, sign me up!!   Pops was so happy about everything that he took us to Bob Evans for lunch which was good as I had a buy one, get one breakfast coupon; I can eat breakfast for lunch any day of the week!!

While we were eating lunch the sun started to peek out a bit and as we drove him back to the nursing home it played peek-a-boo in the clouds.  Now that I am finally back at my own home it is out in full force and should be for at least another  2.5 hours.  This warm weather is supposed to continue through to the weekend, and I am hoping that it stays till after Halloween as that is so much more fun for all the kids – not having to wear a coat under your costume on Halloween is such a treat!!

This weekend we are supposed to be on “stand-by” for our friends as they have to move back into her mom’s house.  Their apt has a mold issue and his hours got cut so they have to move.  For now it is better for them and the baby; not sure if it is better for her mom though……………..   He has a job interview on Wed so am praying that he gets it as it will be full time with benefits and at least a $2 raise!!

Sweet hubby has sacked out on the couch so I am thinking of having a bit of a nap myself – guess I didn’t sleep as well as I thought last night!!  Been so tired lately – and that is just not me!!

I will go nap now and enjoy the Indian summer sun tomorrow!!

Half way

It is half the way through October and hard to believe.

So much has been going on lately that there has only been 2 days of the last 14 that the vehicle has remained in the driveway all day long and we have only been outside to grab the mail and newspaper.

The last few days we have both been bothered by some sort of sinus infection thingy – though sweet hubby has had a horrible sore throat and slept a complete day.  The doctor gave him a test for mono though we haven’t heard if it is a nay or yeah on it.  I cancelled appointments today so that I could sleep as late as I could.  That and a few doses of antibiotics have made me feel a bit better.  At least I am not going between chills and sweats, as I did yesterday.

Yesterday I spent the day huddled up in my blue shrug and an afghan.  I was so cold.  Then when I went to bed I would go from freezing to blazing and sweating.  Sweet hubby said I was running a pretty good temp.  Thank God that was gone today as it was as beautiful outside as only an Indian summer day can be.

Yesterday they moved Mimi into a permanent room in the nursing home.  You can tell she is depressed about it.  She had told me that she will miss going to her church and also seeing her house again.  We went and helped them pick furniture and pictures out of it to put in the nursing home.  Her granddaughter asked that I come over to help, as I seem to know what she cares about and likes.   (That is like duh…. if you would’ve just spent some time with her once or twice a month instead of once every three or four months you would’ve known too)  I was happy to help.  It was just so, so, so sad for me.  I will miss visiting her house too.

Tomorrow is haircut day for both of us.  Looking forward to having these locks under control and out of my eyes.  Looking forward to sweet hubby not having hair that almost looks like a pompadour.  Now, if we could only shave the cat so she would stop shedding every where!!!

Hope you have a wonderful day and I will try to visit more often on here.  Just a little hard to get back into the habit.